The Day The World Changed

You didn’t realize it, but the world changed on July 16th. It changed for me, anyway. You could say my world changed, but that wouldn’t be enough.  I just finished watching Jurassic Park and Dr Ian Malcolm, played by (pause) the, (long pause) um, (pause) the great (long pause) Jeff Goldblum, explained the butterfly effect. According to this idea, it could have been anything that sparked this turn of events.

Back to the Future‘s alternate 1985 Biff-controls-Hill-Valley, or Mr Destiny’s strikeout-turned-homerun, or any of a dozen other scenarios played out in Hollywood, describe this day.

Flux CapacitorI have done it.

I was standing on my toilet, and I was hanging a clock, and I fell, and I hit my head on the sink. And that’s when I came up with the idea for the Flux Capacitor…

…which is what makes time travel possible.

I put it in a DeLorean. I figured if you’re going to build a time machine, why not do it with a little style?

But it doesn’t run on regular unleaded. It needs something with a little more kick–plutonium! Which, I’m sure will soon be available at the corner grocery store, but is currently a little hard to come by.

…Oh, wait that’s not it. We have an AmoebaJr on the way!

That’s big news. In addition to the 2 furry critters we currently take care of, and the worms that eat our vegetable scraps, and the birds I feed in my backyard, we’ll have our own little bundle.

Amoebette or AmoebaJr?

AmoebaJr rolls off the tongue better, so I think I’ll stick with that for a while. At some point, we’ll know the actual gender, but it’s really pretty inconsequential for now.

Well, since I had to get the plutonium from some Libyans by promising to build them a bomb, and I instead gave them a case of old pinball machine parts, I imagine they’ll start looking for me soon. I better go for now.

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